How my vagina destroys my life.

Some months ago, I feared I had a UTI, and shuffled to the medical centre, in some amount of discomfort.

I gave my name in at reception, and waited my turn. Presently, a chubby, pleasant looking Asian man came through and mumbled my name. It sounded more like 'hamster' than 'Hannah' in hindsight, but I digress. The man was obviously not fluent in English, who am I to judge.

I was led to the office, whereupon he handed me a piece of paper with a skeleton drawn upon it, and asked me in broken English to indicate where I was feeling pain.

Now, this was not standard procedure. Usually they just ask you what your symptoms are, get a test maybe, and prescribe you some antibiotics. But obviously the good doctor didn't know enough English to glean that much information from me, so he preferred to work through pictures. Alright, whatever.

Trying to be professional and pretend this wasn't embarrassing in the highest degree, I circled the crotch-area of the skeleton, which now seemed to be mocking me with its overlarge grin.

Doctor Asia studied the picture for a minute, then motioned for me to hop up on the bed/cot thing. Oh my god, he was going to give me a physical. Fuck my shitty life. I hadn't shaved or anything. It was going to be like traversing the Amazon. My shame knew no bounds.

Bravely, I got up there, and awaited instructions. I may have unbuttoned my pants in anticipation of the humiliation to come.

Doctor dearest then tells me to lie on my stomach. He was going in from behind? What the hell?

He's a doctor, Hannah. Don't be ridiculous. Do as he says.

I did as I was told. He started lifting up my shirt and massaging my back.

What? Was this his idea of getting me relaxed before invading my privates? Who knows. It felt really good, and I was feeling more at ease already.

He then asked me where I felt discomfort. I motioned vaguely to my groin. He asked me to turn over onto my back, and started massaging my hip area.. he asked again where it hurt... I motioned lower, because he was really nowhere near my crotch at this point. He looked horrorstruck at my unbuttoned pants and backed away.

What? What did I do wrong? DO YOU WANT TO DIAGNOSE ME OR NOT, OLD MAN!?

He then looks at me and says he will send me in for an X-Ray.

"An X-Ray?" I said, puzzled. "Why do I need an X-Ray? I just need antibiotics!"
"...What for?"
"... My UTI?"
"I can't do anything about your UTI! You should see your GP about that!"
"I thought you were the GP!"
"I'm a chiropractor!!"

I fled and have since never shown my face there again.