Tuesday, January 4, 2011

How Harry Potter ruined my childhood.

When I was 11, my dad bought me my first Harry Potter book. He was sure I'd love it, and I did!

What he didn't anticipate, was that I'd expect to be whipped off to Hogwarts by Hagrid any day (because in the book, magical children get whipped off to magic school at age 11). I kept this expectation very secret, because I felt that if I said it out loud, it may not happen.

Hope lives eternal in the fiction-obsessed heart.

I waited and waited, waking up every day thinking, "THIS is the day I go to Hogwarts, surely!".

By the time my 12th birthday rolled around, I had wound myself up into an excited frenzy. Sure, the book said you go to witch school at 11, but it's just a book. I mean, it could be 12, they don't know!

What was my awesome present for my 12th birthday? A stamp-book. As in, a book where you can place the stamps you collect.

WTF? I hated stamps! No, I didn't even care about them enough to hate them, they were just the useless things you put on letters! And now I had an ALBUM to put STAMPS in?

Words cannot express how deflated I felt. Like, imagine waking up on Christmas Day to find that, SURPRISE! It's really National Anthem Day (or some other crap nobody cares about) instead.

Still, I soldiered on. My thirteenth, birthday! That would be it for sure! It made more sense anyway, you know, the first year of 'teenageness'. 11 and 12 didn't seem that likely, now that I thought about it. They were quite arbitary. Thirteen, on the other hand... well, it just made sense.

M thirteenth birthday came and went, without so much as a flicker of magical ability. How I tried to move things with my mind.. to no avail.

Well, thirteen was a bit young to learn magic anyway. How could thirteen year olds handle the responsibility? They couldn't. It must be 14.

At 14, my parents decided to move to Australia.

Aha! This was it! Obviously, India didn't have a Hogwarts branch, and we were moving closer to the school!

Eventually, my dreams died a slow and silent death. By the time I was 15, I stopped thinking about it. I had even forgotten I used to harbour this fantasy. I guess I had repressed the memory for fear of spiraling into depression.

My heart still aches when I think about the missed opportunity. Maybe the letter was lost in the mail. Hogwarts wouldn't bother following it up, because hey, I'm not Harry freakin' Potter, I have no scar, my parents are alive and well (god damn it!). I probably just faded into obscurity.

Dumbledore forgot I existed
And now he's dead. :(

 Is it really so wrong to want to be a part of this?

18 comments:

  1. I felt the exact. Same. Way. D:

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  3. Aseela: *cries tears of happiness*

    Careful there, Darren. You're playing a dangerous game. You're playing with my *heart*!

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  4. Absolutely hilarious!! Awesome!

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  5. Sadly, or hilariously, I know how you feel.

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  6. This post reminded me of all my childhood disappoint I felt when I had to go to a REAL school and not a castle. I think JK Rowling let a lot of us down.

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  7. i love aseela's comment - too funny! i want to go to Hogwarts too!

    www.maggie-jean.com

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  8. this is amazing. you are amazing. just found you on 20sb and will now follow you in the hope that more harry potter related rants will ensue

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  9. JK Rowling will never be entirely forgiven for ending the HP series, and making absolutely certain that nobody else could keep it going either, with her shitty, shitty epilogue.

    Travelgirl; In the interest of full-disclosure, there might not BE any more HP-related rants. :(

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  10. Just found you, read through your blog and fell in love with you. :D
    I am so following.

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  11. Listen. I don't know how to say this. It's... well... it's about Father Christmas. You know, Santa. It's just that, well... he doesn't really... oh, never mind...
    x

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  12. last month my sister commissioned me to knit a scarf and mitts in griffindor colours for one of her friends who evidently harboured the same fantasies as you growing up. you are not alone.

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  13. Awwiee.. I felt so.. SO d same.! n I kinda still secretely think itx "18".. U noe probably it aint "School" at all.. Mayb itx COllege.! :D [what does J.K. Rowling know, nywya...]
    *hopes, hopes and hopes*

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  14. Wow! I really think Harry Potter is amazing, everything about it from the plot to the characters. EVERYTHING! :) when I was 5 years old the first move came out,harry potter and the philosopher's stone, of course I nagged my parents to get it for me and they did! At that age I still did'nt read any of the books (too young I guess) but how I loved that movie!! *My typical day as a 5 year old* wake up, go to the bathroom, go to the living room, put the HP 1 videotape inside the VCR and watch hp over and over again until bed-time lool. I was glued to the tv screen so much I memorized every line, even my parents knew the lines because of me reciting them all the time.. and they.. let's just say they're not much of tv people. Yeah I'll admit it, I, like everyone believed that HP was real, I tryed so hard to perform common spells like "wingardium leviosa" or "lumos" to no avail unfortunately. :'( Just like you I awaited my hogwarts acceptance letter for ever! I used to imagian that I was in hogwarts, obviously in gryffindor.. :) sitting right next to hermione (lool I had a crush on her at the time), ron and harry, well to be honest I imagianed that I was Harry! haha good times! I'm 15 now still love HP and will forever.. wow it's been 10 years, and as 15th of july approaches..I just feel soo saddened, that immense and exciting feeling of being able to watch another movie or read another book the following year..I just loved it. I still do watch the movies over and over again i guess it's just what I do and no way in hell am I ashamed of that!..Harry did'nt ruin my childhood, HARRY POTTER IS MY CHILDHOO!

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  15. If its any consolation you should see how harry potter is your childhood! Everytime I see them I'm reminded of a time where I didn't have to worry about financial aid, college, etc.

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